Sunday, March 28, 2010

Conan the Destroyer Article from Star Blazer Magazine!

I came across this old article hyping the release of the abysmal crap-fest, Conan the Destroyer. They do their best to really talk it up and I admit it's a charming look into the pop-culture past of our favorite barbarian. It's followed by a brief two-page interview with the director (i.e. - the man who single-handedly killed the Conan movie franchise) and then capped off by an almost hilarious contest page in which fans were invited to write in why the loved Conan the Destroyer. My answer would have been brief, and probably included an f-bomb or two. ;)















Anonymous said...

awesome I want this magazine!

Mike D. said...

Is Arnold Shwartzenegger any relation the former actor who became Govenor of Khalifawnia?

Kaiser Crowbar said...

Sure, Conan the Destroyer was kinda dumb and had a script that Roy Thomas and Gerry Conway were disappointed about, but I wouldn't go so far as to call it an abysmal crapfest. At least Sarah Douglas and Olivia D'Abo looked hot and, hey, for comedic effect, they let Grace Jones run around in an embarrassing leather outfit and act like the bat shit crazy she-male she usually is (I don't even think the director was successful in getting her to read the script).

Now, the Deathstalker movies, those were an abysmal crapfest.

Reis O'Brien said...

Oh man! The Deathstalker movies SUCKED SO BAD!

Truth be told, I have seen Conan the Destroyer many, many times and I like to tease it. I guess I'm just bitter that it didn't stand up to the first movie and killed a potentially great movie franchise.

Now the Red Sonja movie? That movie is so bad that I love it!

And yeah, Sarah Douglas is ridiculously hot in any movie!

Anonymous said...

To be fair, Richard Fleisher directed many, many awesome movies, including the phenomenal Disney "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea"...

Kaiser Crowbar said...

But he also directed Mandingo. Oh, the humanity.

I just re-read the captions on that article. Princess Jennha? Queen Tamaris (?) promises Conan that she'll bring back Valerie? What kind of spell checkers were Star Blazer employing?

Though I do find myself agreeing a bit with what the article said in the beginning. The apocryphal works just fall flat in comparison to Howard's original stories.

Anonymous said...

nobody killed the Conan movie franchise, Arnold IS Conan, so he no refused make another Conan movie, thats all.

Conan the Destroyer, is a guilty pleasure. i love it!

Again, No Arnold no Conan.